Friday, June 16, 2006 @1:37 AM
hello gals, i'm feeling down now...
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i had a chat with mr ray just now, yesh, now i shall address him mr ray as i think there's a difference between me a childish 19 and a experience mature 28. i confirm that we are ONLY friends now !!! hmm... well after today's phone call.
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we chatted about worldcup then about the meeting thingy. after this we talked about his first impression of me when he saw my pic, the one during CNY. he said i looked OLDER. **angry** somemore like 20+. argH~
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after this i was saying about guys think that looks are impt. then he said he's ugly again la, not confidence about his looks ... he said that i looked that someone who judges a book by it's cover ... hmmm ... which i take looks importantly la ... haha ... but i denied although it TRUE !! who don't ?!?!!!!
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then don't know how we talked about xxx. omGz ... i was talking about his ex-gf then he asked about my relationship thingy too. then he said " you have a bf so long ago in your sec sch, then it's such a short period, and u don't have bf after that. so u are a virgin? " **blink . blink** duH !!!!!!!! WTH ?? i was shocked. then erMz ... openly, we talked about xxx la. as i only say say but i did nothing before la.
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he talk me about his past relationshipSSSSSS (which i don't know how many la) and his sex experienceSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS which i think quite a lot !!! from his first gf till now la. oMGz ... at first he used words like "making love" which i think it's nice to describe sex as this... then after that... when talking about other gf, he mentioned SCREWED. **horror** my GOD !!! then somemore that he told me that he had screwed one virgin out of his gfsssssssss.... omGz ...
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******can tell that i'm shock by the number of omGz i had mentioned
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then he add on: "when i hmmm ... pen ... hmm .. draw then there's blood." ahhh ... so SCARY !!! then he thinks it's pretty scary too, then ... but after the first time she enjoyed it. can tell when having sex... duHHHH ... okki ... i'm a childish 19 young adult !! i keep saying that sex is scary... but he don't understand why la. then he asked me not to say scary as he will feel guilty for it. haa... think i pissed him off. as he asked whether i wanna continue on this virgin topic. i thought he wanna change topic actually, but we hung up the phone la. other than this, he still have other experiences la... but it's his life. which is normal at his age i suppose ???
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anybody knows ?!?
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we decided to postpone to next month btw... and he said it's better to meet when i have the urge to see him. well, think i have none of that now... haa... there's such a gap between us. i'm not that ready for glamour love life yet !!! glamour love life means -> love . sex that ppl do la ... maybe i'm single for that LONG ... then will feel it's scary la ... argH ... but it's indeed SCARY ...
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sooo ... really gotta beware and becareful of strangers !!! guys have motive when they do things?!? haa .. i pissed him off. think i won't hear from him ... phew ... let me drink some nerve calming tea !!! **sip . sip** ahhh ~~ god bless me. actually i know that outside there are indeed a lot of ppl engage in sex, maybe about 95%. then i'm the 5% abnormal ones ... which they will feels that they strike lottery when they finds one ... hmm ...
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actually during the conversation we were joking and kidding in between these topics la... but i don't really feels comfortable if i'm observing someone ... argH ... my stomact lurched when i heard him talking about his sex scenes ... of course not in detail ! just briefly ... ohh mann ... sick!!
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after soo much, what do u gals think ?!?!?!?
